The Scene
As the Tavleks
are boarding. Johnny and Miss Sun are walking down a corridor.
What
went wrong!
BEN: (Irritated)
John Wayne. No, the big guy...True Grit, The Searchers, The Cowboys,
Atilla the Hun. Oh no, look, forget about Atilla the Hun...everybody
makes a bad movie. But the point is....
DIRECTOR: (Exasperated)
Cut!
BEN: What?
DIRECTOR: Gengis
Khan! Not Atilla the Hun.
CLAUDIA: Jesus!
How many times are we gonna do this fucking scene? Can't we replace
him with a puppet?
BEN: No way
was John Wayne in Gengis Khan!
DIRECTOR: He
was!
BEN: Fine!
From the top?
DIRECTOR: Please.
BEN: John Wayne.
No, the big guy...True Grit, The Searchers, The Cowboys, Atilla
the Hun. Oh no, look-
DIRECTOR: Cut!
CLAUDIA: (Smacks
BEN about the head) Moron!
BEN: Hey, I
said Gengis Khan!
DIRECTOR: Shit.
KEMPER: Have
we got any puppets we could use?
BEN: Hey, come
on guys. Everyones entitled to a few mistakes!
DIRECTOR: This
is the thirty-fourth take, Ben.
BEN: Yeah,
well...
CLAUDIA: (Tapping
BEN on the head) Hello! Anybody home? Earth to moron.
BEN: Hey, cut
that out!
KEMPER: Puppets?
Hello? Anybody listening to me?
BEN: (to KEMPER)
Look, hey, I can do better.
KEMPER: Then
do so, or... (Slides a finger across his throat)
BEN: (Gulping)
Okay, no problem. Atilla the Hun, right?
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