The Scene
The Illanic
ship is disintegrating on the screen before the crew.
What
went wrong!
BEN (entering):
Is there a problem? Damn! (Seeing the ship disintegrate.) Who
does that belong to?
RYGEL/JON:
I don't know. Don't care. (Suddenly one of RYGEL's hands reaches
out and grabs BEN firmly by the groin)
BEN: Jesus!
JON: What the
hell?
PUPPET GUY:
Sorry, some kind of malfunction here.
BEN: Get...it...off...me!
ANTH: Thought
you liked that sort of thing.
CLAUDIA: (Snickers)
BEN: (Unable
to speak, just grunts angrily)
DIRECTOR: Can
we please get this sorted! We have a scene to shoot.
BRIAN: Don't
damage the puppet!
BEN: (Glares
at BRIAN)
BRIAN: And,
er, Ben, of course.
PUPPET GUY:
Ah, Jesus! Does anyone have a crowbar?
BEN: (Grunts
in fear, eyes widening)
CLAUDIA: I
have!
BRIAN: No crowbars!
PUPPET GUY:
(Shrugging) Well, he's got a pretty good hold...
CLAUDIA: (Pouting)
Please....
BRIAN: No!
BEN: (Turning
blue) Hnhhhnnhhghhh!
GINNY: Hey,
he looks like me!
A crew member
runs onto the set with a set of pliers. He looks towards BRIAN,
who nods reluctantly.
DIRECTOR: Someone
had better get the doctor up here.
DOCTOR: Yeah,
like I'm ever off bloody set!
PUPPET GUY:
(Taking the pliers) Okay, Ben, remain perfectly still.
BEN: (Nodding)
GINNY: Be careful!
That's about the only useful part of Browder. (Winks)
PUPPET GUY:
(Winking back) I know!
KEMPER: Pervert!
Is nothing sacred, Ben?
BRIAN: Apparently
not. You have seen his collection of rodents?
PUPPET GUY:
(Fiddling around BEN's groin) O-kay....easy does it. (Snipping
sound) Phew!
BEN: (Hands
heading straight for groin) Oh, thank you God!
<back next>
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